saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
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