(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize