It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Randomize