Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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