It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
My sheets look like a crime scene.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize