I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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