what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
Randomize
