i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Randomize
