"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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