At least make sure they are 18
Why
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Randomize
