can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Randomize