Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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