you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
