Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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