Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Randomize
