what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
