My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
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