idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I need a beard to bite.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
