Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I am one with the molecules
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Randomize
