I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
