that's an acceptable place to lick
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Randomize
