If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
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