Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
