Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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