I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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