So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
She's the barista slut.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Randomize
