Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
never play flip cup with pint glasses
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
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