So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account
damn...impressive bar tab
no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
