I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
