I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize
