Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
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