I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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