i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Randomize
