If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize