Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
