hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
