So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Moan for me like Helen Keller
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Randomize
