I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
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