I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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