you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize