I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
