all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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