By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
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