i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Randomize
