Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I deserve this hangover.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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