wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
