I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
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