He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
did i walk over a car last night?
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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