You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
