ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Randomize