Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize
